A Homeschool Perk for which I am Thankful

Seeing how the holidays are times for families to get together, that also means an unexpected bonus -- grandparents who are willing and eager to babysit.  So my husband and I have had a rare gift of quiet time for just the two of us. While the kids dragged their grandparents off to a jumpy place, we spent some time having a few of those conversations that never seem to occur when children are present.  It is often difficult to discuss real world matters (or even household matters) while enduring the constant barrage of "Mommy, Mommy... Daddy, Daddy" followed by a need for assistance, arbitration or refereeing.    This was followed by a delicious dinner at an Italian restaurant with white tablecloths and excellent service.  It is amazing the dining experience one can have when there is not a french fry or chicken nugget to be had on the menu... but alas that is a topic for another blog entry.

Now we are indulging in the luxury of relaxing in a quiet, local coffee shop. This may very well be bliss.  I understand that Black Friday to many means elbowing through the masses at unholy, early hours fighting for a great deal. Personally, I would rather have every strand of hair on my head pulled out one by one until I was bald.  There is nothing that I either wanted or needed so badly that would justify getting up at "O' Dark Early" and standing in a line waiting for a store to open.  Give me a laptop and an Amazon Lightning Deal any day, if I need to feel a part of the Black Friday shopping frenzy.

So while I am lounging on a comfy sofa, sipping a Salted Carmel Mocha Latte, I got a little contemplative.  Ahh, this is the life.  We have so very much to be thankful for and are truly blessed.  But those of you who have been following my blog, know better than to expect a list of true, actual blessings.  There has to be some sarcasm or something less "touchy-feely" somewhere, right?

Well, thanks for your indulgence.  I do have a "lesser" blessing which is a real perk of homeschooling to be thankful for this season.  One of the most spectacularly wonderful perks of homeschooling is not being intimately tied to an alarm clock.  Having most days begun by the horrendous screech of an alarm clock since I was about eleven years old, this is pretty revolutionary. We still have alarm clocks and I even use them (especially for early morning basketball games), but my life does not revolve around the alarm clock. Hallelujah!

If we are up late for a good reason, for no reason or for any reason at all, we simply start our school day when we wake up.  Georgia does not have a homeschool police that will haul you off to the local public school if you don't start your school work by 8:00 a.m..  You've gotta love that!

Tuesday, my daughter was taking a children's cooking class on pies and pastries at Whole Foods.  This did necessitate the use of an alarm clock to ensure that we were there by 9:15.  We passed by the kids' old private school on the way to Whole Foods.  We could see all the extra cars in the parking lot for Grandparents' Day.  While it is a lovely tradition, I always resented having to get the kids up at 6:30 to be at school for such a short day.  We were usually in the car on our way home by 10:00 a.m. from the early dismissal. It hardly seemed worth the gas and fighting Atlanta traffic to get there before 8:00.  Well, not this year!

Another euphoric moment surrounding not being tied to the alarm clock occurs every week at my seven year old's basketball practice.  His practice starts at 7:30.  After practice, we walk in the door just a little before 9:00 p.m. with a dirty, sweaty, little boy who is wound-up, hungry (again) and in need of a bath.  If he had to be up the next morning by 6:30, I would be a stressed, frantic mom, foaming at the mouth while screaming, "Get to bed!" about every twelve seconds.  Not this year!  I don't resent the program or coach, I don't complain to everyone within ear shot that this is simply too late for little kids on a school night.  My son gets to bed when he gets to bed -- clean and fed (yet again).  I just let him sleep until he wakes up the next morning.

This is a revolutionary lifestyle for me!  Homeschoolers, by the very nature of what they are doing are bucking "the system."  They are stepping outside the norm and doing things in a whole new way.  But little did I know that homeschooling was going to be such a radical change of the way we had always lived our lives up til now.  I am truly grateful to step away from the necessity of a daily alarm clock.

Be honest, how many of your children are grumpy and miserable when they have to be awoken by an alarm clock???  We made jokes all last year about how my daughter could appear on a new Nick show called "iSnarly" because she was so very grumpy in the mornings after the alarm when off.  Last year, she left for school grumpy and returned home exhausted.  It is a true perk to see my child at times when she is not tired and grumpy.

I am only sorry that my husband is still forced to begin the majority of his days with an alarm clock.  The good news is that it does go off later now than when we had to get the kids to school.  But sadly, he still has to use it.  I feel guilty when he is forced to get up and hop in the shower while I am still dozing or giving our dog the attention she constantly craves while I am still warm and snug under the covers.  I genuinely feel guilty, but not so guilty as to set my own alarm clock.  After all, having been raised Catholic, I can live with some guilt.

Myth of Socialization

Before committing to homeschooling my children, I thoroughly researched both the pros and cons of homeschooling.  While there were various "cons" mentioned throughout my research, there was one overriding concern expressed by those who were opposed to homeschooling... (prior to reading the word, I do so hope that you have the proper mental picture and actually hear the sound effects of dun, dun, dun, duh from Beethoven's Symphony No. 5 in your mind) "SOCIALIZATION."

For those who are convinced that "socialization" is the preeminent goal and achievement of brick and mortar schooling, nothing will ever sway them from their position.  Which is fine, to each their own.  For me, however, education is my predominant concern and focus.  Actual understanding, obtaining knowledge and truly learning is my uppermost priority.  Socialization is an important part of development, but I do not believe that it is the "end all, be all," nor is there is only one "proper" method to obtain said "socialization."

It is my opinion that homeschooling is as unique to each individual family as our own homes are to each of us.  Who has ever walked into someone's home and found it decorated exactly the same as your own?  What kind of a crazy experience would that be?  Every sofa, throw-pillow, drape, picture, and chotchkies all identical??? It would be very creepy.  What about our individual taste and style?  I could never move into a house completely decorated by someone else and feel as if I was "at home."

So why is it that we not only accept, but expect total conformity and uniformity in education?

"Socialization" is a myth when it comes to homeschooling.  Homeschooling is not an "institution" that can be pegged into neat little categories.  Homeschooling is a choice made by individual parents to treat the education of their own children individually.

Will some people choose in their individualized education plans for their own unique family to isolate their children?  Perhaps.  Might some people choose to overcompensate out of a fear of a lack of socialization and over-schedule their children?  Maybe.  In life, people choose all sorts of different things. How many times have we wandered into the mall or Wal-Mart and wondered how on Earth someone could ever choose to wear that?   Your choice does not have to be mine, or vice versa.  Thank goodness!

I don't worry about socialization.  According to the Oxford Dictionary, "socialization" is the ability to mix socially with others or to behave in a way that is acceptable to their society.  My children are "socialized."  They are not isolated.  They are respectively a Girl Scout and Boy Scout in troops/dens comprised of children who are in traditional schools.  They both play sports.  They are also in a homeschool co-op group.  They play outside with the kids in the neighborhood.  They go to birthday parties and spend the night with friends.  They laugh.  They cry.  They skin their knees.  I would never allow them to become isolated.  It is not my style.  I am personally way too social for that.

The New York Times ran an article the other day inviting kids to comment on whether or not they would want to be homeschooled.  The comments are extremely interesting.  Many children were adamantly opposed to the idea of homeschool for socialization issues and rarely cited any educational concerns.  There were stark contrasts between the writing skills between traditionally schooled children and homeschooled children.  I found them fascinating.  Brick and mortar schools did not fare well when one looked at the child's ability to write a cohesive, grammatically correct comment.

"I think homeschooling is dumb. I think homeschooling doesn’t prepare kids for the real world. they don’t learn how to socialize with other people. Some parents may sugar code the kids. So they might not know everything there suppose to know. no i do not agree."— Leslie R

"Being homeschooled you can miss out on makeing friends and you might not have that well of an education. you would be missing out on alot. you need to be socaila and confident about talking in front of peopl and being around everyone and when your homeschooled it doesnt prepare you for that."
— Chelsea 

I think I will continue to "sugar code" my kids and I won't worry about their being "socaila."  I will, however, continue to worry about the state of education in our country.

Is Homeschooling Working?

I haven't had a chance to post a new blog in quite a while.  Some of my friends have been very delicately asking, "So is everything still going okay?"  Since they haven't seen any of my ramblings or tirades posted, they are getting a bit worried.  Have no fear!  We are just busy... really, really busy.

Academically, things are rocking along.  Science and history are the kids' favorite subjects.  They love it and more importantly, they actually understand what they are learning!  Our experience at a STEM exposition which we attended at the Gwinnett School of Math, Science and Technology several weeks ago illustrates this understanding.

One of the instructors gave my youngest a one-on-one demonstration of a scientific principle in which a fluorescent lightbulb lit up without actually be connected to a power source.  Here is a recap of their conversation.  It did not go the way the instructor expected.  I believe she was expecting a comment from him along the lines of, "Cool!" or "Neat!"  That is not quite what she got.  Of course, I will be unable to refrain from little editorial comments here and there.  Sorry!

After watching the light bulb light up:
My Son:  "It is kind of  like a covalent bond, they are sharing electrons, right?"

Instructor: (flabbergasted) "Uhh, (large pause) yes!  How old are you?" [Apparently she is thinking he is must be extremely short.]

My Son: "Seven."

Instructor: (completely shocked look) "Where do you go to school?"

My Son: "I don't."

[This worries me a bit when I first hear his answer. No school?  Are you kidding me?  What about all that work we do?  Remember math, language arts, spelling, science, history etc.???  We "do school!" Hmm, perhaps I am getting a tad defensive here.  Might he mean something else?  Duh! He is quite concrete and very literal.  He does not, in fact, "go" to a "school." Note to self:  Switch to decaf.]

Instructor looks at me a bit bewildered at this point.  I explain to her that we have just begun homeschooling and in all fairness, we are studying chemistry.

Instructor:  "Well it is certainly working."

Yes, yes it is!

Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop

What am I missing here?  We have been officially homeschooling for 30 "school" days now.  Family, friends and random folks are politely asking, "So, how's it going?"  It isn't quite the rhetorical question of, "How are you?" to which no one is actually looking for a truthful answer.  The "How's it going?" comes after the "Hey" and "How are you?" conversational starters.  The "it" in the "So, how's it going?" question, is always referring to homeschooling.  So I take a deep breath and think before I answer.  How is it going?

The answer is, "Shockingly well."  "Really well."  Hmm.  

I must admit that I am quite surprised by this.  I was expecting to be going a bit crazy by now.  Stir crazy or even a bit "postal" even were some possibilities I wondered about.  I think my husband is still holding his breath before he walks into the house each evening.  What will he find?  Has his family imploded or are we still doing okay?  Check!  We are all okay.  No one is going crazy.  The kids are not at each other's throats. In fact, they have never gotten along this well.  Hmm.

Am I missing something?  I am starting to wonder if I am delusional.  Could this really be working out so well?  Uh, yes.  Are the kids actually learning? Hmm.  Maybe that should be the new area of concern.  Are they learning? How would I know?

Yes, they are learning.  I have math tests that came with each child's math program.   They are doing extremely well on the tests.   They are reading books. They are writing and creating.  They are applying what they learn. (This isn't too hard to check up on because as their teacher, I know exactly what we have covered.  So I can tell when they have made a connection to new information.)  They are actually retaining the information that we have covered! 

For example, after studying Ancient Egypt, we had a field trip to the Carlos Museum.  While examining a coffin, the kids started identifying all the gods in the hieroglyphics.  They did an amazing job of making connections while examining the various artifacts throughout the museum.

Holy Cow!  This homeschool thing seems to be working!  Man, when the other shoe drops, it is going to really stink.  Because to be honest, right now this is really fun!  It is a lot of work, but truly rewarding to watch your kids thrive.

  

Survival of the Nitty Gritty

If you have read my prior blog posts, then you know I have tried some pretty fun things to ease my children into the homeschool lifestyle.  However, as we all know, field trips alone will not adequately educate a child for today's world. As boring as it is, we all need to know how to spell and use punctuation. Like it or not, no one will make it in this world without math.  So, it was time to buckle down to the "Nitty Gritty" studies that my kids were dreading.

Good News!!!  We have made it through over a week of all subject homeschooling without anyone dead, maimed or bleeding.  I call that a success!  I would be lying if I said that the kids did not complain or have some meltdowns. They were to be expected.  I also anticipated testing of boundaries and comments about missing school friends.  I was not disappointed there either. Check those of the list, boundaries were most certainly tested! However, I met the challenges without loosing my cool and turning into a screaming banshee.  Success again!

For all of you who think that not turning into a screaming banshee is a poor definition of success, then you must have something that I lack, namely... PATIENCE.  Patience is a virtue that I simply do not have.  I think that when St. Peter was distributing patience in heaven, the line must have been too long so I probably just left.  For those of you whose kids are still in brick and mortar schools, search your conscience.  Weren't you just a little relieved when school started back up this year?  Any thoughts of, "Phew, we made it through summer"?  I think you see where I am going.

I have noticed that homeschooling has a double-edged sword of time with your children.  24/7... no breaks.  It is a lovely thing and it can also be extremely annoying.  I can tell that we are going to have to figure in some mental health breaks for Mommy.  Or as an alternative, my husband can go ahead and reserve a room for me now in the psych ward.

So did either child have any interesting moments during this past week of nitty gritty work?  Yes, for both of them.  My 2nd grade son has issues retaining rote facts. If it is not interesting, forget it!  Challenge him, and he is all over it.  He had no problems keeping up with his 5th grade sister in science and history.  But, math facts???  He can't be bothered.  He did have a lightbulb moment when something finally clicked.  We were listening to counting songs in an attempt to get the information to go in a different way. He asked about the lyrics where 9 would "slurp" (sound effects included in the song) one of the number it was adding.   The idea is that 9 is stealing one to make 10 and then leaving the rest.  Eureka!  He laughed and shockingly-- remembered!  The "slurping" noise got his attention long enough to let the concept sink in.  Then it was a simple jump to see that 8 steals 2 from the number you are adding it with to make 10 and 7 steals 3.

How exciting to see a lightbulb moment!  You mean to tell me that I have been letting his teachers have all of these???  Shame on me!  I'm glad I didn't miss his first steps.  This feels about as exciting as some of the baby milestones. Why would his intellectual milestones be any less important than his physical ones? I believe I have found the Holy Grail "PERK" of homeschooling.  This must be why so many families have chosen this path.

Did my daughter have any revelations this week?  Why yes she did, thanks for asking.  Hers also came during math.  She has always gotten math concepts extremely quickly.  So quickly that she has developed a nasty habit of not being required to think.  She is used to things being so easy, that she tends to freak over small challenges.  Her knee jerk reaction is to think that she can't do it if the solution isn't readily apparent to her.  This is one of the main reasons we wanted to homeschool her.  She has a beautiful mind that needs to be challenged.  Her first mental challenge came this week when she was required to combine factoring, algebraic thinking and mental math all together.  It was quite a shock!  It even caused to her to roll on the floor in tears crying, "I can't do this."  But with a little encouragement and showing her just how much she did in fact know, she attempted it.

It took real effort and (gasp) "thought" to find the solution.  I explained to her that she could do it, but it would take a genuine thought process to find the answers.  It was a challenge.  Her response was, "I like easy better."  But we stuck with it for about thirty minutes and then she conquered it.  Her smile when she realized that she could do it lit up the room.  Genuine accomplishment of a challenge!!!

Once again, I had a fantastic feeling that I had helped guide her.  No wonder teachers put up with poor pay and unruly classrooms.  The "Ah-Ha" moments of children must be addictive. Greedy me, I get to keep all of my children's "Ah-Ha" moments for myself.

The nitty gritty of homeschooling is going to be a bumpy, exasperating road.  I have glimpsed some of the perks, however and I think the journey will be worth it.  Educating my children is not going to be a sprint, but rather a marathon.  I hope I have the endurance for the challenge.

Sneaky Education

I believe that any parent knows just how difficult it is to get a stubborn child to voluntarily eat vegetables.  You might find it easier to grow wings and then fly away to the moon.  For many families, this analogy would hold true for education.  Not too many children are going to eagerly climb onto the sofa next to you and say, "Oh please Mommy, may we learn grammar, spelling and math now?  Please, PLLEASSSEEE!" So like hiding vegetables in purees of pasta sauce, I would like to be diabolical and trick my kids into learning when they least expect it.  Perhaps I need to glue on a pencil mustache and start wearing a black cape as I eerily chuckle "Wa Ha Ha."

As a homeschooling family, my husband and I are now solely responsible for taking knowledge and somehow cramming it into our childrens' heads in such a way that it won't leak out their ears and be lost forever.  Ideally (Please laugh at the word "ideally," we all know how best laid plans have a way of working out.) knowledge would be acquired as a symbiotic part of their lifestyle-- simply, easily, seamlessly, painlessly etc.  Activities that are a normal part of daily life would provide countless teaching moments that the children would eagerly absorb like little sponges.  Ahh, can't you just hear the angels singing?  (I also have a unique opportunity to sell you the Brooklyn Bridge, feel free to inquire through the Comment section.)

Since I am not normally completely delusional, I wouldn't expect things to be quite so simple or work so smoothly.  But after our Florida vacation, I guess the joke is on me.  Who knew that the spark of curiosity could so easily return to my children?  But it did...

Our beach vacations have always involved getting out and seeing what the area has to offer.  We love trying to find educational things to do rather than just pure "tourist trap schlock."  This year we made a special point to go to the Clearwater Marine Aquarium so the kids could meet Winter the tailless dolphin who is starring in her own movie this year, Dolphin Tale.

They had a blast, despite the sweltering heat.  Although a bit shy at first, they began to ask the volunteers more and more questions.  We expected a semi-quick visit to the Aquarium and instead stayed for over five hours.  It was amazing to watch as they would listen to an answer, think about it for a minute or two and then come up with another question that was an extension of the first.

Would they remember? Would it sink in?  Oh my, but yes!  My son became intrigued by the horseshoe crab.  After a few minutes, his sister, who was not quite so enthralled with the horseshoe crab went off with her father to learn about something else. Forty-five minutes later, they came back surprised to see that we were in the exact same spot, studying the exact same thing. How often do seven year old boys focus on something for that long?  He excitedly dragged his sister over and began to explain to her everything he had learned about the horseshoe crab.

For us as parents, this is what "Homeschooling" is all about-- learning as part of our lifestyle.  Following up on the interests of our children and taking the time to allow them to learn.  Perhaps we need to re-name "Homeschooling." Maybe we should start a campaign to call it, "Stopping to Smell (and Learn About) the Roses.  I am hoping that "learning" won't be quite as difficult as getting my kids to consume vegetables.  Maybe I won't need a diabolical plan after all...

First Day of Homeschooling

Monday, August 1st was our first day of homeschooling.  Nobody (neither the kids nor myself) had any idea what this was going to be like, but we had to start sometime.  Since we don't live in Utopia and I am not June Cleaver, I knew that we were going to have "issues."  Okay, okay, I know that we are going to have knock down, drag out, explosive, screaming hissy fit kind of days.  Days were I will want to pull out the checkbook to write a check to their old private school or walk down to our neighborhood public school (which is less than a mile from our house) and throw them in.  Luckily, our first day wasn't one of those.  Phew!!!

Since I have been doing a lot of research on homeschooling before jumping off the "brick and mortar" ship of schooling, I knew we were in for "adjustment issues."  Since I like to pretend that my mother did not raise a fool (on most days)-- although we probably shouldn't ask her what she thinks about that one-- I knew I needed a plan.  Hmm... kids will feel very weird when all of their friends return to school.  What can we do?  Bribery!  Yet in an educational kind of way...  I love it when a diabolical plan comes together.

We have begun homeschooling with a unit study on Roller Coasters.  I have timed it so that our field trip to Six Flags will be next Monday when most all of the public and private schools have their First Day of School.  Every now and then I have sparks of true genius!  What kid can feel sorry for him or herself when screaming their lungs out while racing along a white-knuckle grip roller coaster?

Are they actually learning "real" stuff?  Yes.  They now know, understand and can explain Newton's Laws of Motion.  In two days, they have done experiments which illustrate the principles involved in each of Newton's laws.  I even snuck a little math in on my daughter when she had to calculate how many people rode the Switchback Railway on Coney Island when the fare was a nickel and the creator LaMarcus Adna Thompson recouped his $1600 investment in just three weeks.   Shh, don't tell her.

I did get a spontaneous hug and a "I love homeschooling," from my daughter on Day 1.  I need to take a mental picture of that incident, because it may be a long time before I ever have another one.  Was it all smooth sailing?  No.  The same darling daughter had a meltdown when I asked her to write-up Thompson and his life.  But it was resolved without Mommy freaking out, she did it and even apologized.  Apparently prayer works!  

Why should my kids love homeschooling?  Because I have set them up!  First we study roller coasters and have hands on "experimentation" at an amusement park.  Second we will be completing a unit study on Chocolate.  Yes, you read that correctly.  Boy the sacrifices I make for my children!  The taste testing for this study will be traumatic, but somehow I will manage.  Third we will be taking a vacation to the beach while everyone else is in school.  Only then, when the kids kind of like the idea of Mom as the teacher, will we begin the nitty gritty of math, spelling etc.

Who knows, maybe, just maybe I won't wind up in a padded room of a psych ward until after Christmas.  A truly crazy thought, maybe this will be the best thing we have ever done...